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LADYLEO78
I spank him, i talk to him and even take away his favorite toy but it still don't work, how do i deal with it?
Answer
Children of this age normally try to acquire some autonomy and decide things for themselves. And you really do have to let him have his way as much as you can without letting him endanger himself or make life very incovenient for you. Or else, he is going to have psychological problems later on.
"Toddlers are constantly striving for more independence. This creates not only special safety concerns, but also discipline challenges. The child has to be taught, in a consistent manner, the limits of appropriate vs. inappropriate behavior."
....
"It is important for parents not to follow into a pattern of negative behavior with yelling, spanking, and threatening of their own."
http://www.drgreene.org/body.cfm?id=49&action=Display&articlenum=2010
Here is advice from a pediatrician about how to parent such children:
PARENTING TIPS
The toddler years are the time to begin instilling values, reasoning, and incentives in the child to conform to accepted rules of behavior.
It is important for parents to be consistent both in modeling behavior and in addressing appropriate vs. inappropriate behavior in the child.
Positive behavior should be both recognized and rewarded.
Time-out may be initiated for negative behavior or exceeding established limits.
The toddler´s favorite word may appear to be "NO!!!" It is important for parents not to follow into a pattern of negative behavior with yelling, spanking, and threatening of their own.
Teach children names of body parts.
Stress unique, individual qualities of the child.
Teach concepts of please, thank you, and sharing with others.
If not already reading to the child on a regular basis, this is a good time to start -- it will enhance the development of verbal skills.
http://www.drgreene.org/body.cfm?id=49&action=Display&articlenum=2010
Children of this age normally try to acquire some autonomy and decide things for themselves. And you really do have to let him have his way as much as you can without letting him endanger himself or make life very incovenient for you. Or else, he is going to have psychological problems later on.
"Toddlers are constantly striving for more independence. This creates not only special safety concerns, but also discipline challenges. The child has to be taught, in a consistent manner, the limits of appropriate vs. inappropriate behavior."
....
"It is important for parents not to follow into a pattern of negative behavior with yelling, spanking, and threatening of their own."
http://www.drgreene.org/body.cfm?id=49&action=Display&articlenum=2010
Here is advice from a pediatrician about how to parent such children:
PARENTING TIPS
The toddler years are the time to begin instilling values, reasoning, and incentives in the child to conform to accepted rules of behavior.
It is important for parents to be consistent both in modeling behavior and in addressing appropriate vs. inappropriate behavior in the child.
Positive behavior should be both recognized and rewarded.
Time-out may be initiated for negative behavior or exceeding established limits.
The toddler´s favorite word may appear to be "NO!!!" It is important for parents not to follow into a pattern of negative behavior with yelling, spanking, and threatening of their own.
Teach children names of body parts.
Stress unique, individual qualities of the child.
Teach concepts of please, thank you, and sharing with others.
If not already reading to the child on a regular basis, this is a good time to start -- it will enhance the development of verbal skills.
http://www.drgreene.org/body.cfm?id=49&action=Display&articlenum=2010
Is It Safe To Leave My Toddlers Play Desk In Her Room At Night?
My daughter is nearly 2 years of age and i have recently moved her into her own room with a safety gate.
She has a desk in her room for which today she was climbing on and i have become a little worried of the idea she might use it to move to the door and climb over the safety gate.
My partner says i am over reacting; but seems this is highly possible, i am not sure that i am? Any advise please? Many thanks in advance.
Answer
teach her not to climb
Remember you can child proof your house but not the world. She needs to be taught what is safe & what isn't. So if you removed the desk from her room and other things she can't climb on then what is going to do the moment she sees thing she can climb on? CLIMB
My son was a climber. We made sure his dresser in his room was secure to the wall but that is it. When he would want to try to climb things we would firmly tell him no, tell him it wasn't safe & so on. If he did climb on something he wasn't suppose to like grandma's bar stools & he fell a bit we'd say "No climbing. You will get a boo boo." This would get the message across.
Make sure her room is safe with out let covers & making sure furniture like dressers, toy boxes & so on won't fall over on her. But that is it.
Show her how to sit in a chair for her desk. Show how it is used to color & draw. If you see her tying to climb on it again just tell her no. Showing her how to use the desk will also explain why isn't for climbing.
We also made a rule where you only climbed outside. Like it is ok to climb on the swing set or play land thing. It is ok to climb onto a see saw or jungle gym. But it is not ok to climb on things inside. Does that sense?
Teach her she isn't to climb over the gate. No touching the gate either. I'm curious at why you have a safety gate on her door?? Do you just not want her to come out of her room at naptime or bedtime? You can teach her taught. Right now all the gate is to her is road block. All she knows is she can't go past it. But does she know why? You can easily teach a child to say in their room when you want them to & yes even at 2 you can do that.
I wrote an article about "Room time" which includes that you can read it here -
http://mythoughtsoffaith.blogspot.com/2010/07/what-to-do-when-your-child-stops.html
teach her not to climb
Remember you can child proof your house but not the world. She needs to be taught what is safe & what isn't. So if you removed the desk from her room and other things she can't climb on then what is going to do the moment she sees thing she can climb on? CLIMB
My son was a climber. We made sure his dresser in his room was secure to the wall but that is it. When he would want to try to climb things we would firmly tell him no, tell him it wasn't safe & so on. If he did climb on something he wasn't suppose to like grandma's bar stools & he fell a bit we'd say "No climbing. You will get a boo boo." This would get the message across.
Make sure her room is safe with out let covers & making sure furniture like dressers, toy boxes & so on won't fall over on her. But that is it.
Show her how to sit in a chair for her desk. Show how it is used to color & draw. If you see her tying to climb on it again just tell her no. Showing her how to use the desk will also explain why isn't for climbing.
We also made a rule where you only climbed outside. Like it is ok to climb on the swing set or play land thing. It is ok to climb onto a see saw or jungle gym. But it is not ok to climb on things inside. Does that sense?
Teach her she isn't to climb over the gate. No touching the gate either. I'm curious at why you have a safety gate on her door?? Do you just not want her to come out of her room at naptime or bedtime? You can teach her taught. Right now all the gate is to her is road block. All she knows is she can't go past it. But does she know why? You can easily teach a child to say in their room when you want them to & yes even at 2 you can do that.
I wrote an article about "Room time" which includes that you can read it here -
http://mythoughtsoffaith.blogspot.com/2010/07/what-to-do-when-your-child-stops.html
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